Getting to Know You

District 8 ministers for churches in the Christian Church (Disciples of Christ) denomination seek to gather together once a month for learning and fellowship, with the exceptions of the summer months of June and July. This district consists of churches in the following counties: Scott, Bourbon, Harrison, Fleming and Mason. This being the seat of the Disciples movement, there are quite a few churches in our district. Most try to meet regularly, but there are never meetings where everyone can participate. Our district gathered at North Middletown Christian Church this past Monday and we had a nice representation of clergy from our area for our last meeting before dismissing for the summer break.

            It is always a joy to gather with colleagues, supporting one another in ministry, learning from each other and sharing creative ideas. Our host minister was Rev. Stephanie Moon and as host, she proposed the program of discussion for our gathering. As she is currently working on her doctorate degree in funeral practices, she chose to share a resource she stumbled across in her research efforts. “Having the Talk of a Lifetime: A guide to help you have meaningful conversations with your loved ones about life and the things that matter most,” published by the Funeral and Memorial Information Council. The purposes of this document are to get families discussing the important things in life and sharing stories with each other in an effort to plan funerals. The average layperson may question our idea of a good time, but for a room full of clergy, we could see the value in families taking on these discussions long before there is need of our services for a funeral. We decided to give this guide a trial run and were delighted by what we learned from one another.

            Utilizing questions suggested for conversation starters, we each shared stories from our own life experiences. Many were quite hesitant at first. It’s hard to open yourself up so vividly to colleagues who, other than knowing names, faces and where they serve, are complete strangers. I was amazed at what I learned about the people with whom I engage in ministry for our denomination. Our district hosts published authors, accomplished flugelhorn musicians and singers, someone who had lunch with Eleanor Roosevelt, one who was accused of snake handling (a pet snake had babies), and someone who found out he and his spouse were pregnant the very week the baby was born. We heard lovely stories of how individuals first realized they were adults and those moments in life that hold the distinction of being pivotal moments in a faith journey and those quintessential times of immense joy. You might be amazed at how you look at someone differently when you know these intimate pieces of their stories. Perhaps we should try this exercise at one of our fellowship gatherings. Maybe go through a few of these questions the next time your family gathers for a meal:

 

• What is your earliest memory?
• What is the story behind your name? Did you ever have a nickname?
• How would you describe yourself as a child? What is your best memory of childhood?
• When you were a child, what did you think your life would be like in the future? How is it similar? How is it different?
• When did you know that you had finally grown up—the first time you realized you were an adult? What happened? At that moment, did you realize, “Ah ha! I’m an adult now” or did that realization come to you later?
• Did you have pets growing up? Which was your favorite?
• What historical event do you think defined your generation? Why? What happened? How did it impact your life, family and hometown? Looking back, how do you feel about the event now?
• What, if any, religious/faith tradition has influenced your life? Are there prayers, scripture passages or other religious texts that are important to you?
• Did you ever receive an award or win a contest? What did that mean to you?
• Have you ever met anyone famous? What happened?

 

This guide has many more interesting questions. Just let me know if you’d like to try this exercise or borrow this guide for a gathering you might soon have with friends or family. It’s not only informative; it’s a lot of fun!

Blessings,
Tracy